I wonder what’s happening in the desert!

My neighbor the Acrobat came back yesterday, back early from Burning Man as planned, walking up the driveway like a zombie… a dusty, red-eyed zombie with cracked nostrils and a thousand mile stare. He sort of croaked “I haven’t slept in 36 hours”. A bit later he was walking around just as zombified with kleenex stuffed into his bleeding nostrils, and then I found him passed out on the floor in front of the TV. It was kind of cute. I *so wonder* what stories he has to tell about the trip…

And how is Rook going to come home, after a week!

Stress level and curbs

I’m going to City Hall right now, on Day 3 of wheeling the few blocks to Moomin’s school, I have had to yell at drivers nearly every trip, and because of the steep curbs I have to go most of the way in the street. Even at stop signs people don’t stop all the way — the fuckers. But keep rolling towards me slow & ominous as if they just can’t be bothered to do more than tap their brakes. I hold up my hand in a “stop” position and yell at them but the point doesn’t get across. Next time I will roll right up to their window, demand they talk with me, and if they won’t put their window down it’s time for a good window-bashing with my cane.

My knees and back hurt a lot this morning, for no reason I can discern. Toes too, in that “change of air pressure” way. I’m limping nastily. Take me away, Celebrex….

Anyway, it’s time for me to print out a map of here to the school and bring it to City Hall, marked up with fucking highlighter. I’m mustering all my polite steeliness.

OR… by the end of the week I’ll be out there with a wheelbarrow and a guerrilla crew, pouring concrete for makeshift ramps.

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I think the next week or two will be fairly intense as I spend lots of time with Moomin to get him on the right track doing homework. He likes it so far, but there are so many different little tasks and he needs a bit of reminding about reading directions and putting papers back where they should go and then doing the next thing instead of wandering away to read comic books.

On the plus side it is all interesting homework so far — he commented that it’s not boring, even if there’s more of it. “Not like the old ones where you just do more and more math facts.”

I have to go finish my own homework — the giant sheaf of paperwork that came for me

Moomin is reading Danny, Champion of the World for his homework reading book! I will never forget how impressed I was when I first read that book — at the ingenious “Sticky Hat“.

I wish I could blog super frankly about work and how odd it all is, but I won’t. Since I think about it a lot (and have been over the last 6 months) my blogging has been a bit oddly limited… a fair chunk of my brain is over there thinking through it all, but I don’t feel like I can write about it in the way I’d naturally do that.

Big trips and school

Rook is on his way to Burning Man in his car alone full of days of preparation, reading, shopping, packing, and practicing the setting up of tents. I forgot to give him safety pins and a handkerchief for the back of his hat! And… also his hat is rather amazing; a bright blue straw cowboy hat with a chin strap. Even when hats are big enough to go on his head, they look weirdly out of proportion and you realize that he has a really enormous head and that something is out of whack. I think it is that the hat inside brims are big enough, but the hat itself has not been scaled correctly to be bigger on the outside. Someday I would like to find him a properly fitting hat. Anyway, I’m vicariously excited for him to have adventures at Burning Man, and a little mother-hennish feeling about him getting sunburned, chafed, sick, being at all miserable or uncomfortable, or taking too many drugs and not having emotional or practical backup; but actually he has a camp of people we’ve known for ages and also he can take great care of himself. A week ago I was also a bit worried he was not prepared, and maybe I would be semi-forced into a position of having to pull it all together for him, but then he totally went online and read tons of stuff and talked with people for advice and did all the prep. Huzzah!! I will miss him this week. We have barely talked all month really as he has been away a lot and I have been incredibly preoccupied with new love and relationship. We did have a conversation about domestic things. Here is our domestic negotiation about housework and responsibilities: do I act or feel too responsible for house things (yes) though things changed so massively when I went back to work (though, actually over the last few years i’ve been in grad school full time which is also Work and also wrote all the time, also Work though mostly unpaid) and when I became somewhat dramatically disabled in late March so for months – till June really – Rook did pretty much everything (with omissions that built up imho that I am still now dealing with). This because he came to tell me that he felt guilty for leaving the house in chaos and messy and dirty for his trip and perhaps I would help him clean and also i should call the maid service and schedule things. To which I was like Ummm then clean it…. I just cleaned it last week… for example in the last two weeks I have scrubbed things and cleared and decluttered and done endless laundry and recycling and trash. I went so far as to demonstrate where the bathroom cleaning supplies are and what I do to clean it. And in fact it is not that messy… (defensiveness! guilt!) and if he likes… HE could call the maid service and schedule things. To which he counterdefended that actually I am being too touchy about it all and over-responsible-feeling. He complimented my stuff. And I complimented him on his thoughtfulness about food-buying and cat-litter-box-cleaning. And he warned me that I need to rethink my role and that he wants to be careful to not fall into old patterns (both of us) that don’t apply so well now that I am working. I suggested that we do my trick of setting the kitchen timer for 10 or 15 minutes and all doing tidying-putting-away (NOT dishwashing or regular maintenance – but just picking up stuff). Then, it will feel more fair, and not be too onerous. Rook said the timer thing sounds annoying as sometimes he is not in the mood and has things to do. I said that I am NEVER in the mood and always have other things I must or should do and yet, I still find myself at 10pm picking shit up and putting it away and still stumbling over other people’s and my own shoes, toys, clothes, books, trash, etc. Zond-7 has said he will do dishes and trash when he is here… as well. I do not love the idea of an actual chore chart, but it might get tried. It seems easier to declare a brief and limited cleaning-time in the evening… perhaps before the administration of ice cream which often happens around 7:30 or 8. The timer and group participation might also help to relieve me of the responsiblity (which settles on me automatically unless I cultivate deliberate awareness, which I had without thinking till I hit age 30 and had a kid) of being aware of what needs to be done and the *constant undercurrent of putting things away* which is SO useful as a housewife but saps one’s creative energies. I would rather have a filthy house (with the minimum of being able to find keys, wallet, phone, and be able to walk in a clear path without stepping on my clean laundry) and get to think uninterruptedly of other things – dreamily – free in mind.

(And — the house IS somewhat nasty – but not unduly so – and did I mention (defensively) again that, if a toilet has been cleaned, toilet-cleaning stuff bought, or a floor swept, in the last year, and it was not by a hired housecleaner, who do you think has done it? Invariably, me. I mean it’s like once a month. But still, all me. I do not mind; I just want to know it’s appreciated.)

Meanwhile, Moomin’s school started on Monday and it was very exciting. the PTA had muffins and coffee. kids line up on the playground. The curb cuts on the way to school are SUCKY as I wrote to the city facilities person about months ago (and got no answer) and it is dangerous as I go the two blocks and three street-crossings in my wheelchair. I have to go most of the way in the street. A couple of the curbs I can hop in theory, but others I can’t as they are steep and dangerous.

Moomin came home with non-boring non-worksheety homework that is quite minimal… and a million forms we have to both read and sign or initial and that i must fill out. BLAH forms!

A nice mom talked with me today and also a nice dad. When the dad talked about Hell-CC the giant church-opololis on the hill i said my piece about how they are Eeeeevil and discriminate and also sneakily put in lots of religious indoctrination in children’s sports camps that they claim are not religious in focus. Because they’re Eeeeeeeevil. I did not stay quiet about what i think about it but also did not blame him or act snippy… I just SAID. The other mom is queer and nice and smiley and very science-and-writing geeky, and her kid is a huge nerd. Definitely someone i want to hang with!!!

Zond-7 might come, but likely not as he must take his cat to the vet and she will need comforting; he could bring her down on the train but that would not be very comforting. And I can’t go there or I could but it would be a haul with Moomin and also getting back down here for his school by 8:30. alas. So, likely Wednesday.

Last night I nipped up to the city for drinks with Skud and friends as she is going back to AU and on world travelling adventures… Xyzzy was there, and many other friends… I liked the bar a lot – it was very much like Austin bars. Zond-7 and I were over-sappily gazing at each other but I really can’t help it! I ahd fun talking with J. and yatima and then joked around like crazy with jong as we left… and there was indian pizza which Zond-7 heroically obtained… and we played a very pathetic embarrassing game of Galaga. I was really very tipsy on no food and half a mojito, the whole time we were there. I managed the Xtreme Stairs with pride. Oh, walking!

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Beach day delirium, strange shapes bring in a banquet

Friday I hung out and worked from SF from That Cafe, meeting Skud and some guys I work with (Matthew and Marc) and Zond-7 who showed up for an hour to rant about how much he hates the snootiness of That Cafe (pre-caffeination). I had the best tacos ever with Marc and Matthew who nicely drove me to La Taqueria on 25th and then Mission Pies which I had just described to them in glowing yet slightly mocking terms as a beautiful utopian thing. Then shovelled Zond-7 off to the dentist at 2 and got him around 3 from downtown. Our vacation cannot be stopped by mere mortal things such as traffic or lost fillings. I don’t think *I* could get a novocaine shot and a crown replaced and then be in good temper for a drive and a vacation but Zond-7 can, or can fake it well! The coast was beautiful… there was no traffic once we were on the highway… all was magic and imaginary leaping dolphins with rainbow sparkles. We established with tenative pokings that we are both the sort of people who like to stop randomly and often on road trips. We got a smoothie and some fudge and …. holy grail (unused as yet) index cards as Zond-7 was fantasizing about how index cards were about to bring the molecules into alignment and in the correct chambers. Every once in a while over the weekend we would sigh out “Index cards!” pleased that they were there just in case. We stopped at the beach… we talked about so many things that I will never remember and cannot list… I did hear entertaining differences in me and Q’s travel styles. Apparently my saying “let’s fuck around in this random shopping center to buy fudge and eat it in bed later at midnight for energy” hit home as an elemental Difference from “we are in for the long haul and will pack much flat food wrapped in tin foil which will sit on the engine block and cook”. Which strikes me as having a certain charm as an experiment (yet not a way) and I prefer convenient if overexpensive food, not fussing about things, midnight fudge, and crumbs in bed as a luxurious pleasure of life. The beach — i think it was Bean Hollow — was beautiful and nearly deserted but not quite. We didn’t care and made out disgracefully as if completing a postcard of the beach with a slot for “snogging couple”. After a bit we tried to move out of direct parking lot view. The sand was warm, the water freezing, we did not see otters, we rolled in the sand, there were pelicans galore; everything was fuzzed with a golden halo. Back on Highway 1 we saw a bobcat cross the road — a cat, no, it is huge, its ears are tufted, and no tail. The drive into redwoods from the coast is always astonishing, gold and sage and dryness and dunes turn to furry post oak canyons then suddenly a cleft and you’re 200 feet down into cathedral pillars and shadow. Among all the beautiful things we talked about I am suddenly thinking of Zond-7 breaking into a silence by remarking dreamily on the way the trees looked like they had dropped down not grown up because of how straight they are – like stalactites – and I felt so fond of him for this quality of reacting to any situation by looking at it and having a new thought, a sort of fertile improvisation, erratic – I just like how he reacts to the world in general. I do it too. By the time we got to the Secret B&B it was 7 or so. I was not as crippled as they had expected. D. welcomed us with absent-minded professorly concern. His partner’s razor sharp observations made me want to hide a bit — plus, I had to pee. The room felt very private, separate from the house. I like to think of myself as unfussy, and I am, but I do have aesthetic awareness and this room was the nicest I have ever been in, down to every detail. Things were where you would expect them to be, convenient things, beautiful and useful, extra things you don’t expect but think OH how every sensible and good. The tub, enormous, stone, with a sort of bulgy part underneath the tap in a different kind of rock obviously fiddled in by hand on purpose to catch the water stream. We stayed up pretty late, I think, but I lost track of time… it’s bizarre for things to be so amazing but to be also sure that they will continue to be more so and it is not some random peak of feeling or coincidence or new-love surge.

Breakfast in the morning was … well I was feeling like oh will it be annoying and intrusive or what… but instead we walked into the living room of the house and the other 2 couples were there playing scrabble with coffee in fancy china cups quietly chatting and then we all had breakfast together at the table… and everyone was nice. and D. and S. and the other person served us breakfast in 3 courses complete with shakespeare anecdote about how D. felt like Prospero and his invisible spirit minions at the feast and Ariel saying we must think on our crimes… I loved D. and would not mind going back to talk to him and S. sometime. What a beautiful unexpected thing to say and image to give while shimmering in like a philosophical butler and placing honey and biscuits… I shall record the fantasticness of the food (forgive me) A wedge of pineapple that looked like an enormous piece of cake – perfectly ripe and sliced and in its shell – with slices of ripe warm banana covered in lemon sauce and cinnamon. Biscuits with butter and honey and apricot jam and another kind of jam but the apricot was the best. Eggs and spicy sausage sort of things and fried tiny peppers and potatoes, all perfect. And I drank about a gallon of coffee – still delirious from the night before – As I still am right now. We spent the rest of the morning in bed and in the giant giant deep bathtub. We thought about going to the shakespeare festival with them but ended up doing the redwood park instead and again finding a nice compatibility of liking to lie down in a quiet spot and stare at the trees.
Meanwhile we talked and Zond-7 entertained me royally with the History of J4vascript and then the 3 kinds of Object oriented programming with tangents on various actual people and with me interjecting my own experiences — it is very fine to bitch about my encounters with hideous objecty code that didn’t have any reasons to be that way. Observer; Aggregate or Collection; Commander, etc. explained as well as history of the architecture patterns dude and his books and the trends following them. My own counterlectures were shorter and more interruptive or disruptive; ocean surfing tips, rants on various topics, resolutions and organization, personal history, feminist internet controversies, whatever the hell else I usually talk about, (interrupt) but it’s another day later now, so I don’t remember anymore. We discussed what to do in another tenative establishing-of-norms-or-expectations conversation (trying to make sure we were not just saying what we thought the other person wanted or or expected in an endless round of doublethink) and concluded we did not want to waste more time sitting in a restaurant, or going to a town, or going to a place of crowdedness, or calling people we know, or going back, but instead would like to be somewhere else nice and space-outable, zennishly spacing out and talking and looking at things. This ended up being scott’s creek beach, which had some very excellent warning signs about rip tides, sharks, water contamination, not breaching the lagoon, and many other forbidden or dangerous things. Walking in the sand was a challenge, but not impossible. I went halfway in the water until my feet stopped being numb and instead ached scarily – though I could have waited it out. Soon we should go to the beach with both kids, to the excellent place with tidepools!! We got back after dark and hung out with Skud and Rook and zdashamber for a while – I had to lie down a bit and so Zond-7 and I crashed out with computers as the others watched a movie (that was coincidentally my exact anti-pattern of a good movie, with extra hollywoodyness).

The rest of the weekend I stressed about my article deadline, helped Rook do prep for his trip, did kid things and domestic chores and made pancakes for everyone and drove Zond-7 to the train and picked up Moomin’s friend, Hamster, who lives near the train station, and got to hang out with Hamster’s mom in my yard eating tomatoes I grew and picked, and I also walked all the way to Hole Foods and bought things and walked back (!!!) and did not get to hack with Skud mostly b/c of catching up on domesticity and my deadline (alas) but it was a good, mellow, day.

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How it went today and other stories

Today I woke up at 7 not hurting too much, but hurting in my back and knees and toes and finger joints, and shoulders. (As is nearly always true.) I made myself get up and move around when I couldn’t stand to be in bed hurting any more. I did some laundry and picked things up and I think cleared off bits of the kitchen table while I waited for my coffee. Bustling around in the morning works well to force me to move around, so my joints unstiffen. I looked at Rook and Moomin and Mina and Zond-7 asleep all in their different rooms and wanted to wake them up but didn’t. Well, periodically I curled up with Zond-7 hoping that I would either fall asleep again or that he would wake up and distract me from myself. But he would gaze at me dreamily and then pass out again. It seemed more merciful to let Rook sleep since he had been up late and of course I would not wake up any sleeping small children. So I drank my coffee and continued to bustle around from room to room exulting a little that despite hurting… and a limp… I could walk so awesomely. At times today I was almost *striding*. (Unlike the last 2-3 days which have been a hell of physical pain, especially my left knee, which is somewhat from barcamp and exhaustion but somewhat my own fault for overambitious sex; all worth it and I haven’t complained much.) I set out food for kids and poked at my computer and email a bit and thought about work and made notes and plans and more lists. Kids woke up. Rook woke up. Zond-7 remained vague. Showers…. food…. I made Mina’s lunch… folded more laundry… and made lists. I drove Moomin to his slightly squalid summmer camp, got a block away and realized it was his field trip day, went back home to get the correct tshirt id-ing him as being from that camp, dropped him off… Chaos… uncertainty. Then impatiently I poked up Zond-7 again and whisked him and Mina away to Bad-ass mamas coffee day. No grownups really talked with us which was too bad but sometimes happens. Mina was shy of the big kids. The cafe was unusually noisy…I love going there even so. The perfect pancakes! and M. and her sister who are so lovely. And Squid finally showed up and was in tears and I thought maybe she just cracked a bit from the pressure of life or Leelo had hit the baby or something extra difficult but it was some bad news about family friends who died. She does not like for her emotions to be visible so even sympathy or awareness is difficult as one does not want to embarrass her. And yet. And she was trying not to cry in front of Iz, which I understood, not because Iz should not know her mom cries but because Iz is extremely inquisitive and S is quite private and reserved, like Rook. Then we almost missed the train and I got out to see them off figuring that if they had to wait extra I would hang out or take them to the library. But there was another train! Or the first one was extra for the baseball game! Off to work… where I collapsed onto the couch and began a day of vaguely wrassling with the damn licensing thing. I am just making it up based on what a bunch of different people say it should be. None of them seem to realize how deeply they have no real idea — if it were not a grey area there would not be such disagreement and confusion. Sometimes I think my value as a worker is in knowing I have no clue and pulling together judgement from many different intelligent sources. The annoying and very unsatisfying bit is when people think that it is really very simple — and one view is right and all others are wrong. Or that because no one quite knows, I could just pick one “expert” opinion basically at random and go with it. Perhaps one could get away with that. I can’t and won’t. The other problem with this is that no matter how carefully i read a document and interpret it, it is not that that’s the problem, it’s the context, the precedents, various levels of politics, etc. Do I enjoy it? I can’t tell. I like some bits of it, but I really hate the lack of respect and the position I’m in of having no authority or power, but an awful lot of the responsibility for things going wrong, in such a classic bad-management situation I wonder that the world doesn’t explode. If not for that, I might like it. Not to mention the endless phone call meeting with VB the father of numbers who is perfectly nice and vastly intelligent and yet I cannot bear another avuncular explanation of bits of trivia that are outside of my control (Like, why does the Closed Minds Institute have the wrong kind of quotes on the page. I know they do. I have said. Others have said. all one needs ot say is “fix the quotes” to the right person. One need not lecture me endlessly about the need for file formats to be good. If you look for 2 seconds on the interwebs to see the problems of pla1n text compatibility then you will see this is not the first time this has happened… Anyway, clearly VB has mistaken me for his errant grad student. also i didn’t do it. I did another dumb ticky thing, but not THAT.)

A. brought me delicious yogurt which cheered me … food is love…

But most of it was frustrating, and i didn’t get enough done, and I didn’t get the other thing done I meant to do, and I spent a bunch of time flipping off the air while on a phone call and some more time staring off into space feeling vague while trying to think about what next, in between trying to outline on paper what to do next and IM-ing people whinily about how it sucked and reading public snarky blog posts about it. Quick…. i must develop a thick skin AND a positive attitude.

IM-ed snarkily myself with co-worker while in realtime conversation. Oh naughty addiction of note-passing in class! Went off to have a beer. Tried to talk about sporty things with other co-workers (for once) as i had by coincidence done both the sporty things they were talking about (rafting and paintball). Amazing! I hope to take photos of their paintball bruises tomorrow. Home. YAY HOME so cosy! I cooked stir fry with frozen stir fry bag of things from cosco. and it was super yummy and satisfying.

I bought plane tickets for thankgiving after conferring with Rook. He had picked up Moomin and fed him and paid lots of attention. Oh and had taken him to a movie and shopped and read books yesterday.

Somewhere in the day I read bits of things. And last night I read all of Nnedi Okorafor-Mbachu’s Zahrah the Windseeker, which was quite excellent and satisfying with its nervous tough reserved girl-hero and its weird world ripe for sequels and prequels and its Forbidden Greeny Forest with intelligent gorillas; and then a very cheesy space opera that I’m just finishing now to go to sleep with, called Skirmish, by Melisa C. Michaels.

On the way home (partly because of noticing qp’s post and clicking a link on hammocks during a 5 minute LJ break, I was imagining a long fantasy as codependent people in new love do of how when Zond-7 got his new place I would sneak in (“sneak”) and competently (it is a fantasy) install a sort of infrastructure over the bed (which would magically be nice but not too nice) for him to have a hammock and I would also have this fancy hammock which I would have secretly obtained, perhaps the triangular kind that is very fancy that qatipay was writing about on LJ; and i would cunningly arrange it all so that the hammock could be unhooked and swung away, and it would be over the bed so that Mina could play on it and fall off and not kill herself; this all because yesterday Zond-7 and I were in the Pilot’s hammock in the back deck and he was entranced and had *never been in a hammock before*. So when he IM-ed me he had been surfing hammocks I confessed this thought sequence knowing he would understand…

Meanwhile! Moomin told me all about his field trip to Santa Cruz. And read me many comic strips. And we ate on the patio table in the back yard. I did not clean it up. Rook ate banana cream pie from yesterday. I had some hot chocolate and graham crackers in bed while blogging. Rook is writing up his short article on D and D and gender for Cerise magazine. We are almost up to now. I left out how I drove to pick up Eliz. from Jo’s house and we talked gaming. Tonight is the only time before Rook leaves for Burning Man that I have time to be with both her and Rook, I think, so I needed to whisk her away. Realized I ahd screwed up my planning of tomorrow as i was going to hang with skud down here but also said i would be in the city. OOOPS and also i have to be in the city at around 2 to get Zond-7 as we are going off to elope temporarily into the woods by the sea. I have not had a vacation other than the day at Oz Farm. This wll be another long drive and quick vacationy moment. But I wish it were longer. Then suddenly Zond-7’s tooth filling fell out so he must go to the dentist… alas… And so I will go to the city early and hang out and work there and also hang with skud. THEN perhaps take Zond7 to the dentist and THEN go drive off down the coast to the redwoods and a very fancy B & B with a hot tub with vaguely reasonable disabled access with only a few stairs. I want to go into the redwoods AND go to the beach on Saturday if we can pry ourselves out of the hotel room with its amazing looking hot tub. I meant to write about how funny it was the other day when we wrestled each other in bed while arguing with intense passion about epistemology and data structures, really it was the hottest thing ever. Instead I wrote about my very long day so that I could hide that one funny sentence near the end. If I actually told the story it would be even funnier and also the story of his response to my hammock construction fantasy. Now I need to go pack for tomorrow and get ready for bed. I will see tons of friends in the city, I’ll get some good work done, I’ll poke at a fun hackery thing with skud, and I’ll go on fabulous brief vacation. I feel super happy and loved!

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Laptop pod people

I can’t tell in these cafes anymore if the laptop people are people I know, people I just see all the time in internet cafes, or if they just look like people I know because of our vague cultural similarity so that we all have the same way of dressing and haircuts and body language and therefore are familiar. I think 90% of it must be plain old species recognition. It is hard to tell also because people smile at me specially which could be “you’re cute” “you have funny hair” “you’re a cripple” or “I recognize you and you should recognize me.”

Oh! here comes vito_excalibur!

Loafing spectacularly

Can’t tell if me and Zond-7’s mutual love of eating bread and cheese and nilla wafers in bed is a good relaxing normal thing or a slacktastic bad thing, like encouraging each other in naughtiness. But, left to my own devices, this is basically how I eat dinner. With my fingers. Also, with dishes that are somewhat dubious in quality and previously used. Really it’s uncanny.

I felt more normal today and got some work done and caught up on wiki and email reading.

I woke up still obsessing over Freebase types. The madness and beauty of creating taxonomies of everything grips me strongly. I mean it isn’t really, any more than, say, Cyc, or Everything2 or Wikipedia was or is. Still, it’s alluring and it always seems as if it’s just about to be done right…. or more sensibly or usefully.

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Poll for BlogHer Act

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Putting off the actual talks

the funny thing about today is that because I was so busy and a bit worn out I didn’t have a lot of intense talks or thoughts. but instead would listen to people and go “AHAHHH you! I must talk with you …. but next week. Please call me… and let’s meet.” My day was fairly free to have those conversations, but I kept expecting it not to be free, so I kept a little bit detatched. But maybe I didn’t need to be. and yet I found I was trying to track so many things mentally about the logistics and other people’s needs, and about the mood of the crowd (like a DJ) that I couldn’t spare the brain cells to think deeply, even about things I care a lot about!

Talked with Jen M, Susan M, did not get to hang with Grace (alas), did get to connect a bit with people, played with kids, listened to bits of talks (but some were just too crowded for me to fit conveniently in) But I also felt like i was missing out on connecting with lots of people I would like to hang out and have great conversations with… so I have a vague sense of loss. But, on the other hand, I helped make a good conference happen! And despite its difficulties, it was really fun… and I learned a lot about logistics and organizing, which I like doing. I’ll be at someone else’s party another time and will do my usual talking and geeking then.

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